Happy Friday the 13th!!!

What am I doing to celebrate this momentous holiday/insignificant day?  Watching Murder, She Wrote, what else?  I'm hanging with my girl, Jessica Fletcher, solving mysteries and cracking jokes.  What more could a person want out of a Friday night?  Certainly not going out to the bars and drinking with other human beings.  That would require risking my life while a serial killer runs loose.  Seriously, Jason's like the best of the best.  He can use anything.  Crossbow, knife, chainsaw, his bare hands.  I'm not messing with that shit.  Also, I'm really tired.  I foolishly walked around for about 8 hours today.  Since I'm too lazy to invest in an umbrella and boots I've been combating the rain assassin style.  Hood up, crossbow at the ready.

Would you mess with that girl?  I've got my passport/serial killer face on and I'm ready for anything.  And by anything I mean watching Murder, She Wrote.  In retrospect, I should have spent at least an hour trying to find boots and umbrellas.  I entered the mall on at least five separate occasions.  There was no reason for my laziness, but is there ever?

P.S.  This is my 13th post, which I obviously planned.

Watch Out for the Humped Zebras

I didn't want to disappoint anyone by actually finding my way downtown today, so I got lost as per usual, but on my roundabout journey to the core of Croydon I found this gem of a sign.

This is maybe the most amazing sign I have ever seen in my entire life.  All I know is that a humped zebra crossing is basically a free for all where a car just weaves in and out of lanes.  It's dangerous to pedestrians, but hilarious nonetheless.

I'm sitting in the Green Dragon again.  It's 3:30pm and there are at least ten people drinking beer in here.  If I don't get a job soon I'm just going to commit to my impending alcoholism.  If nothing else it will make me more fun to be around.

Day 2: An Expert's Guide on Getting Lost

Obviously I've gotten lost about 15 times at this point.  I refuse to take full blame for this.  First off, the street signs are insanely low to the ground.  I'm only 5'2", so if they're too low for me they're too low for everyone.  Unless you're a hobbit.  I'm pretty convinced that Croydon was actually founded by hobbits.  On top of this Google maps told me to go straight through a roundabout to stay on the road I was already on.  That's not a real thing.  You can't just go through a roundabout.  That's the whole point.  You have to go around.  I think Google maps was created by a group of pranksters who purposely confuse me so that I can look foolish to the locals.  Here's where I am to blame.  I'm trying to trick people into thinking I know what I'm doing, so I never ask for directions and I just walk until I see something I recognize.  Oddly enough Croydon was designed for stubborn idiots such as myself.  The city planner of Croydon has done me a solid by making it so that every road somehow leads to the downtown core.  Even when I get severely lost I manage to get to where I need to be.  So tonight I toast my beer to you Croydon city planner.  I will say this for getting lost, it allows you to see way more of the city than if you were to just stay on the proper path.  I managed to find Croydon Minster and Old Town during today's roaming adventure.  They were both pretty cool and I'm glad I got to check them out.

This is a shot of Croydon Minster.  Admittedly I was across the road at the time, but I eventually got over there to see it and then found my way downtown.

Time for a tip of the day.  If you ever need to open up a bank account in England and you don't have a permanent address, go to Barclay's.  They are like a dream come true for awkward and unprepared travelers.  I can actually get a debit card with my picture on it.  I don't necessarily want one, but I like the option.  Anyway, they didn't need a permanent address, only the address that I'm currently staying at.  In fact, it was easier to open up a bank account than to open up an account at the library.  Since I have no proof of address I couldn't get a library card.  In all fairness to the library, I do have an outstanding fine of $10 back in Burlington, so I'm not the most trustworthy book borrower.  That being said, the people of Croydon beat me hands down though.  The other two people in line with me owed £50 and £28.  How does that even happen?

This is the main library branch (aka the place that denied me free books because I'm technically homeless).

Even though I said that I've been lost a lot I have managed to learn the name of a whopping three streets.  George, Wellesley, and Surrey.  If you're ever in the area just know those three streets.  George and Wellesley both have a lot on them and are on the tram link, so as long as you can find them you can get anywhere.  Surrey has a market on it seemingly everyday of the week.  My two favourite vendors of the day: Meats From Around the World (This included kangaroo and ostrich.  I have every intention of trying this vendor one day.) and Street Cheese.  This isn't actually what it's called, but that's essentially what it is.  You can just buy all kinds of cheese there.  Need I say more?  This is clearly a place I want to visit everyday.

Now I'm back in The Green Dragon.  It's officially my favourite place in Croydon.  There are always people playing pool here, I just heard the theme song to Veronica Mars, and The Simpsons is on TV.  I'm pretty sure the city planner of Croydon also designed this bar.  He's my hero.  I hate to admit it, but as of right now I'm on a bit of a Medieval times diet.  I've had more beer than water and keep eating various kinds of meat for dinner.  In an hour I'm going to challenge the pool sharks to a duel.

I'm still alive!!!

Well, I shockingly made it here in one piece.  I have to admit that I felt really cool going through the British customs line.  Although I had to ask the customs officer if I had to declare my peanut butter, so I feel like that probably brought down my street cred a bit.  Let me start by saying that I forgot how adorable England is.  I spent a solid hour and a half on a bus because it kept getting stuck in traffic.  I loved every minute of it though.

Things I saw and loved on my way to my temporary home:

1.  "School of Motoring" on the side of a driving trainer's car.  How do they even make that sound better?
2.  The area known as Old Malden contained numerous elderly care homes.
3.  They had housing named Maple Court and Lime Court.
4.  A corner store I passed was named "Newsagents and Grocers".  Again, so classy.
5.  The electronic's store here is called Curry's.

Okay, so I arrived at my place.  I didn't get lost, which for me is a big deal.  It's not the best place in the world.  I get the loft, which is sweet, but it's definitely an old place, but it's right off the tram line and close to stuff.  Now I'll let you in on a little secret.  Croydon is awesome.

This picture doesn't do it justice, but the downtown area is everything you could hope for in a downtown.  Loads of shops, cobblestones, and a Chinese food vendor, which isn't in the photo, but I had to mention.

Today is a Wednesday and they had markets all over the place and there are a million shopping centres.  It was insanely convenient for me as I ran around trying to sort out getting a phone and I found the bank, but too late.  Turns out the Brits don't believe in having the bank open super late like in Canada.  They close at 5pm.  I assume this is because their pubs close at 11pm, so they need to get a head start on drinking.  Speaking of drinking, I'm in a pub right now.  I'm officially that weird chick who's eating alone and doing stuff on her computer while everyone else is playing pool and socializing.  Oh wait, there's another guy sitting alone.  I haven't slept or showered for over 24 hours, so I'm not really in a social mood, but I also don't want to just go and sit in a room.  Instead I'm writing this while guzzling down a pint.  I would be completely satisfied if this was the rest of my life.  Unfortunately, I'll have to find a job at some point.

This place is called The Green Dragon and it's pretty awesome.  I may come back here tomorrow for lunch.  Mainly because they have free wifi and they didn't ask for my ID when I ordered a beer.

On the agenda for tomorrow:  Open up my bank account, look at an apartment, maybe apply to some jobs, walk around the market, and probably try some Chinese street food.